I was recently featured in The Times in an article that touched on some of the challenges women, and mums in particular face. You can read the article here. Reflecting on my contribution to the piece made me think about the broader pressures that women experience—especially those of us balancing careers, family life, and everything in between.
Over the last 11 years of being self-employed while raising my family, I’ve learned so much about balance, boundaries, and the importance of support. At 29, I believed I had to do it all —as a mother, a business owner, and a wife. But now, at 40, I’ve realised that something has got to give. Without support, it’s impossible to do it all, no matter who you are.
And you know what? That’s not just okay—it’s liberating.
The Superwoman Trap
When I was younger, I thought success meant juggling everything perfectly. Society tells us that to be a good mum, a thriving professional, and a supportive partner, we must be constantly ‘on.’ But that’s a trap. It sets us up to fail because no one—absolutely no one—can do it all.
Don’t get me wrong, as a family, we still have moments where things are a struggle, and we don’t get it quite right. But the difference now is awareness. We’re more aware of when things are becoming too much, and we allow ourselves to reset.
I’m not perfect—I still have days where I drop the ball—but I hope that by sharing my story, at least one woman will feel able to take a step back and stop putting so much pressure on herself like I once did.
Support Is Everything
One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned is the power of support. My husband and I share the load as partners, and we’ve put systems in place to make life easier. We have help from a cleaner and someone to do the ironing—small things, but they free up time for what matters most. We also are very lucky to have a supportive family, a network of friends who help each other, and use things like ‘after school club’ when necessary.
Evenings are now sacred for us. Inspired by my wonderful friend Laura, we play a game called “Rose, Rose, Thorn, Bud.” Each of us shares two positives from the day (Roses), a challenge (Thorn), and something we’re looking forward to (Bud). It’s become such a treasured part of our routine that even my five-year-old insists on playing!
It’s not just about managing the practicalities; it’s about creating space for connection and reflection.
The Impact of Late ADHD Diagnosis
Another turning point for me came when I was diagnosed with ADHD at the age of 39. It was like someone switched on a light in a room I’d been stumbling through at times. Suddenly, I understood why I’ve always been full of energy, buzzing with big ideas, and able to see opportunities others might miss. ADHD has helped me thrive as a business owner—because people with ADHD are often brilliant at problem-solving, thinking creatively, and taking risks that pay off.
Learning about ADHD has been liberating. It’s helped me truly value my strengths and understand what makes me, me. It’s why I’m able to come up with bold ideas, think outside the box, and adapt quickly to change—qualities that are so valuable in running a business. It of course comes with struggles, but now that I have the right tools and strategies to manage it, I see ADHD as one of my greatest assets.
A Great Team Makes All the Difference
The other crucial part of this puzzle is having a fantastic team at work. I can’t emphasise enough how invaluable it is to have people you trust running the show when you’re not there. It’s one of the reasons I’m able to step away from my business and focus on my family or even take much-needed time for myself when I need to.
Employ well. Hire people who align with your values, who you trust to do their jobs without constant oversight, and who bring their own strengths to the table. Knowing that things continue to happen—projects move forward, clients are cared for—even when I’m not there is something I am grateful for.
Building a great team doesn’t just help you as a business owner; it also sets a foundation for a positive company culture, where everyone feels empowered to thrive.
Protecting Your Energy
If there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that you can’t pour from an empty cup. Whether you’re running a business, raising children, or both, your energy is finite. You need to protect it.
For us, holidays as a family provide an opportunity to reset, but it doesn’t have to be a grand gesture. Evenings spent playing games, dinners together, or just a quiet moment chatting can be enough. The key is to prioritise time for what truly matters.
My Message to Women
If I could give one piece of advice to women trying to do it all, it’s this: You don’t have to. Asking for help doesn’t make you weak; it makes you wise. Building a support network—at home and at work—isn’t a luxury; it’s a necessity. I’ve had some amazing women in my life telling me this for a long time, and now I fully understand the value of it.
Employ well. Share the load. Take time to breathe. You are not failing if you delegate, if you pause, or if you say no.
I used to think I had to prove myself by managing everything on my own. Now, I know that by letting go of that pressure, I’m not only a better mum and business owner—I’m also happier. Life isn’t about perfection. It’s about connection, balance, and focusing on what truly matters.
Supporting Others on Their Journey
I’m incredibly passionate about helping others who find themselves in the same position I was—working in marketing, starting their freelance journey, and trying to balance it all with a young family. It’s one of the reasons we developed the marketing franchise model at activ. Every aspect of it is driven by my desire to support individuals in the way they need to flourish.
I couldn’t be prouder of what we’ve built. If you’re just starting out and feeling the weight of trying to scale your business while managing everything else, I’d love to help. Book a discovery call—even if it’s just for a friendly ear and some advice on how to survive and thrive in your business.